60th page

[loveboat]

Okay you little shits since you can't seem to get into one group again how about you get on the fucking boat

Once you have boarded the boat and set sail, you are free to explore. The captains cabin is offlimits, as is the brig, but the rest of the boat is available to all of the guests. For your pleasure, you will be provided with a honeymoon suite each, access to the dining hall and kitchen if you so please, or you might prefer to dine on the deck. There is also a lounge where a musician plays piano melodies. The entire boat is decorated garishly in pinks and purples, but there are also pieces of OBSCENE art that seem to celebrate the human (or otherwise) form displayed in every room, including the private cabins, public spaces, and anywhere else you might think to look.

There are also couples of every shape, size and gender everywhere you turn. They seem to be enjoying themselves, holding hands and making out like horny teenagers on every possible surface. At least you know what kind of PDA you're expected to live up to.

[ mission: couple off and fake it to make it
note: if your char has been fucking off while in town and hasn't met up with the group just assume dean sam or someone else found them and explained the plan to them ]

Comments

[fairyvagina]

I guess on a ship it's gonna be hard to stay vegan for much longer.

[jiffles]

I've gone clean. Besides it's a huge ship, avoiding people won't be a problem, I promise!

[ he has his doubts but. ]

[fairyvagina]

Well you're gonna have to make to make it work. As long as you don't snap and eat a few people, you should be safe.

[jiffles]

[ okay tim gunn. i'll make it work. ]

As long as he won't snap and cut my neck we'll be fine.

[fairyvagina]

Better pair up with someone that'll protect you.

[aka not her]

[jiffles]

Beats traveling like Dracula.

[sawedoff]

[distractedly]

Standing right here.

[gossip girls. talk a little louder]

[jiffles]

Private conversation.

Do you mind?

[sawedoff]

[they're standing in a crowded line, what do you want him to do, hold his hands over his ears]

[gives him a look that says he's humoring him and turns a little to the left. pretends to not be listening.]

[fairyvagina]

[why even]

[hushes up a little]

Really worryin' like this only makes you look more guilty.

[jiffles]

You suggest I should start frolicking around the ship and kissing everyone?

[fairyvagina]

I didn't say that at all.

[crotchbite]

[ slides a hand in his back pocket ]

[sawedoff]

[WOW DON'T BEAT ANY BUSHES OR ANYthing]

[glances over his shoulder and sighs a little in relief. you never know who's gonna be touching your butt in a shady free love crowd like this]

At least you bought me a drink first.

[crotchbite]

[ if we're infiltrating we ought to play the part ]

Technically, that was North Neal, one of Killian's new sailor friends. But sure, why not.

[ watches the pinup captain throw a fake couple overboard ]

[sawedoff]

Why do you have to ruin a good thing?

[glances at her. and down at her hand on his butt. and back at her. we don't have to play the part while we're waiting to board do we. does your hand still have to be on his butt.]

--I guess Captain Stubette's going love guru on the passengers.

[crotchbite]

[ yes. it's a nice butt. for a guy. ]

Good reference. [ impressed eyebrow raise ] Everyone better not have issues about their sexuality right now.

[sawedoff]

You seem



fine with it.

[he is definitely the more uncomfortable of the two here. his only other lesbian buddy he had to coach through a heterosexual encounter, so this is new and exciting.]

[crotchbite]

I don't have issues with my sexuality.

[ she also does that a lot. use her boobs to get what she wants. shame? what shame. ]

[sawedoff]

Must be nice.

[don't mind him keeping an eye on the deck instead of giving sexuality discussion his full attention]

You could at least tell me your name if you're going to keep groping my ass.

[crotchbite]

[ that's not dubious at all. ]

Here I thought we were in a romantic comedy where both of us could be complete strangers. I'm Hel. You're the guy with the map. [ that's as far as she knows ]

[sawedoff]

Your name is Hell.

[thats]

Awesome.

[no its not. its triggery. youre triggering him.]

Dean. Let's just- try to keep this professional, right?

[no romcom.]

[crotchbite]

[ fuck your triggers. ] Yes. Hel. With one "L".

[ watches another fake couple of burly sailors thrown overboard ]

Professional? That's the word you're going for?

[sawedoff]

[can't help but cringe a little]

That chick has a hell of an arm...yeah, okay, but keep it PG. We have disneys present.

[although two less, now.]

[crotchbite]

What do you mean?

[ PG? you are asking the impossible of her, dean-o ]