168th page

[afterlifeshit]

So you're probably dead. A couple of your party members made it to the L4D safehouse and triggered a respawn point, yaay. Anyone that's died is up and mobile again, you're in a sunnier part of the forest just after a large glass greenhouse that has more green foliage and less evil black junk. Regroup, figure out where to go next, avoid murderfest round two.

[Mission: stick together this time and find a way out. don't get murderized by ghosts. whatever ]

Comments

[andtrue]

... [ pfft. sorry daniel but that was hilarious. ]

Are you so self-centered that you think this - whatever the hell this is - gives that much of a damn about screwing with your head?

[armedarchaeologist]

[stares for another second.]

[armedarchaeologist]

[lays back down.]

[andtrue]

[ stands up. time to look around, get bearings, etc. ]

Is that a glasshouse?

[armedarchaeologist]

[holds out for like. thirty seconds. new record for him.]

I dunno, you put it there, why don't you tell me?

[andtrue]

[ seriously?. ]

You got me. I built the giant glasshouse with my evil voodoo tree magic. I hire evil ghosts to keep my lawn looking so damn nice. It was all me.

[armedarchaeologist]

...

[nope, too dead inside to respond to that. good job ninurta.]

[andtrue]

[ is this his hell? stuck in perpetual limbo with the world's wettest blanket? ]

... No point staying here. See you.

[armedarchaeologist]

I'm sure.

[opens eyes, goes back to staring listlessly up at the sun.]

Just let me know when you feel like killing me again, I'll be right here.

[andtrue]

[ he's debating whether to keep the cigarettes or not. in the end he lights one more and leaves the carton back where he found it ]

[ and heads off into the forest ]

[armedarchaeologist]

[waits for a bear or a yeti or a zombie or who the fuck knows what else to come eat him.]

[foodporn]

[after checking herself over for visible wounds very confusedly as this is her first bout with returning from death. hopefully the last!!!]

[spots him laying there like a dead thing and scuttles to his side, patting his cheek harder than necessary like wake the fuck up hey hey. i mean he's not gutted or waterlogged so that's a good sign]

Daniel? Daniel??

[armedarchaeologist]

[frowns up at bo. or the vengeful goddess wearing bo's face.]

Yep, that's me. We've established that. And I did say you do a pretty convincing Bo impression, but don't you think it's maybe a little early to try the same trick again? Really?

[foodporn]

What are you talking about?

[pushes his face to the side to check for bruises and bumps]

Did you get brain damage in there?

[armedarchaeologist]

Stop that.

[shoves irritably at bo's hands. but he does sit up, so that's kind of like progress.]

What, what lesson am I supposed to take away from this, exactly? "Don't do anything?"

[foodporn]

What, from the forest? God, I don't know, I'm not good at symbolism and...philosophy questions.

[confused? wat?]

Are you okay?

[armedarchaeologist]

You're not good at—

[scrubs his hands over his face under his glasses. breathes in. breathes out. breathes in.]

How are there two sadistic murder forests on this planet. How is this an ecosystem. What the hell is wrong with this place and what did I do to piss it off?

[drops his hands and stares at them.]

[foodporn]

I don't know, but if it makes you feel any better I think we all pissed it off as a collective effort. I kind of lasted a whole big ten minutes after you.

[meeeemorrrieees]

[armedarchaeologist]

Oh.

[looks up at bo and frowns again, but it's a very different kind of frown.]

I'm sorry. I had hoped— Well, when I wasn't assuming you were Ninurta again, I was hoping maybe at least you'd gotten away. Are you. Well, it's kind of a stupid question I guess but I'm gonna ask it anyway: Are you okay?

[nothing quite like your first death to rattle you. at least he'd gone pretty quick the first time.]

[foodporn]

It's not real, right? It's like Ninurta?

[she's really not okay with it. like how dare she get killed. how dare that girl too, whatever her name. how dare this shitty forest make her into that helpless powerless damsel that has a terrible sudden death that makes you throw popcorn at the tv]

[armedarchaeologist]

I don't really know. I mean it felt real, but what would be the point of it if it didn't?

[come to think of it, what's the point of it if it does? noticing bo's fury, he reaches out and pats her on the knee.]

I guess the best thing to do is to go ahead and assume, despite our experiences, that it wasn't real, since we're all here and about as unharmed as we went in.

[glances around at the pissed-off group.]

Did the girl make it, at least? The, the sarcastic and frighteningly strong one.

[foodporn]

I don't know.

[sinks back on her heels with a sour look]

But I'm pretty sure she's the reason I met my untimely end. [and urs too] Who was she?

[armedarchaeologist]

What? You mean the, the human, right? Not the ghost, the human?

[doesn't wait for bo to confirm, but he looks at least as happy about it as she had about being damseled by the circumstances.]

I have no idea who she was, but she, she killed you? After all that business with the running and the barricading, she killed you.

[trust no bitch indeed.]

[foodporn]

I got pissed at her for ditching you.

[brings a hand up to hide in her hair, scratching under her ear]

She didn't like it. Didn't she seem off to you though? Did you see anyone else in this forest that wasn't from our group, other than the.. the dead things? Where did she come from?

[armedarchaeologist]

[eyebrows at bo, because there's a lot bo seems to be yadda yadda yaddaing over here, but he's gonna let it go because they both just died and this is no time for an interrogation.]

We-ll, to be fair, at the time I dimly remember screaming hysterically for you both to run, so I guess I can't be too mad at her for listening to me.

[and this is his thoughtful frown. he has a lot of frowns.]

No, I mean, I was with you the whole time, and it was pretty much just jump scares until she showed up. And after, really. I guess she seemed a little punchy for being chased by malicious spirits, but pot, kettle. Also awfully strong, but I just figured she was some kind of fairy since that seems to be in right now.