79th page

[ladyistcrap]

Night blankets the villages south of the wall. While the pacifistic Gagarians are huddling around what may be the last bowls they'll ever smoke, the Hildnr are preparing to march and ride out in force come the dawn. Thankfully, you're far enough north that the nights are a hell of a lot longer than normal. Looks like you have about fourteen hours to kill.

You'll probably want to make a stop at the armory to get equipped, at some point, but there's also a fair amount of feasting happening where a bard is telling tales of the Hildnr's victorious history. The Blood Queen is in attendance, accepting oaths and blessing the warriors.

Of course, if what you'd rather do is train, the training yards are open, and there's a small barracks hall that's been outfittedwith clean furs and a roaring fire so you can rest before unleashing your bloodlust. Thoughtful!

Just don't forget: you still gotta find the blood champion, save the helpless stoner fratboys, and make it over that fuckhuge wall before lunchtime tomorrow.

Comments

[ladyjohannaii]

Not all that much, but the first drink really knocked my bollocks off.

[it really did. this is a little bit of a sobering thought, but he's still chuckling. wacky fun times.]

Probably I'd blame the wacky backy actually.

[foodporn]

[alright that does get a little laugh, incredulous as it might be]

You're high? That's a first impression that's going to stick, I'll tell you right now.

[appropriates his drink before he does any more damage]

It's for your own good. You're welcome.

[ladyjohannaii]

Not the first time, surely shan't be the last.

[too bad it's not all that representative of constantineness. halfheartedly chases his drink as it gets further away from him. bo's probably right.]

All right, cheers. You weren't with that lot before, were you?

[foodporn]

You'd recognize me, trust me.

[you don't just forget a face and tits like these]

No, I was here when the Hildnr brought the girls in, they said that you guys were looking for a way in. Operation: Mrs. Doubtfire is my fault. You're welcome for that too.

[ladyjohannaii]

I reckon I would at that.

[no you don't. of course this whole group is very memorable. nice everything. on everyone. unfair.]

Well then thanks for everything, love. I'd toast you, but someone seems to have nicked my drink.

[what the fuck is a doubtfire? is that a hamlet joke?]

[foodporn]

Don't thank me yet, you guys only got in. You still have to get out.

[ladyjohannaii]

Not to worry. I've got it in the bag.

[taps the side of his nose knowingly.]

I do this for a living, you know. Finding people. Princesses. We'll be out of here before you can say "Jack Robinson."

[foodporn]

You some kind of medieval detective?

[we've got a lot of hero types out and about in this group, she's noticing]

[maybe it's just a coincidence]

[ladyjohannaii]

Medieval?

[kids these days. the '80s weren't that long ago.]

Occult, certainly. Hardly medieval.

[definitely not a hero.]

[foodporn]

[he said princesses, those only exist in textbooks and fairytales to bo. forgets englishfolk exist]

[remembers something hel told her and gets a little warier]

Your first name isn't...Dean, is it?

[ladyjohannaii]

[it's a good thing bo took his drink away, because constantine would surely have died inhaling it while laughing his ass off.]

[foodporn]

[that must be a no]

[ladyjohannaii]

[oh god too funny can't breathe.]

It's—

[oh god actually can't breathe. this is unpleasant. at some point the laughing became coughing, and that sounds really unhealthy.]

[foodporn]

Oh god-

[SHE DIDN'T MEAN TO KILL YOU BUDDY. eyes him weirdly as he busts out the crazyperson laughter]

[nervous hand flutter as she hovers over him before giving his back a slap or two]

It's okay, get it all out, you're gonna be...fine?

[ladyjohannaii]

I'm fine.

[he's not fine. he sounds like he's trying to breathe yogurt.]

It's John. Or Johanna for the time being, I suppose.

[clears his throat. like, a lot. it would be nice if these medieval societies also drank water now and then, but nooooo, cholera.]

[foodporn]

[pretty gross stuff you got going on in those brackets. pulls her hands away when she sees that he's at least not in immediate danger of passing out and/or dying, but she's still doing the concerned citizen hover]

What was that about?

[ladyjohannaii]

Nothing, love. Thirty pack a day habit. Been meaning to cut back.

[also dangerous habits hasn't happened yet.]

Definitely not catching.

[foodporn]

Right...

[settles back into her chair and gives him the googly eyes of that's not what i was asking about]

So you didn't just almost asphyxiate on your own laughter when I brought up that Dean guy?

[ladyjohannaii]

Nope.

[oh actually he did think that's what that was about.]

Dean's in over his head and hasn't realized yet he's drowning. And there are sharks. And he's bleeding. From a missing leg.

[friends don't let friends hunt demons.]

[foodporn]

Thanks for the cheery imagery.

[ladyjohannaii]

It's a nasty business. Occult detective...ry. Don't muck about with the occult.

[advised the pot to the kettle about the third traditionally wrought-iron kitchen device.]

[foodporn]

Then why do you?

[she may not be involved in the occult per se, but substitute occult for general weirdness and she's basically right there with him]

[ladyjohannaii]

I'm a creature of habit. It pays the bills. Got to clean up my old messes.

[shrugs and reaches across the table for the abandoned drink.]

Pick one.

[foodporn]

You just sound like a masochist to me.

[the only manpain she gives a crap about is dyson's. sorry. but you can have the drink back as long as you promise not to choke on it]

[ladyjohannaii]

Generally not, but for the right person...

[suggestive eyebrow raise, mead sip. oh god that helps.]

Besides, we're not exactly in the same line of work. He said he's a hunter, while I'm more of a... Detective. Someone asks, I solve. I don't go looking for the damn things, for God's sake.

["serial apocalypse-averter" looks weird on the cv.]